Not pinky, not the brain, just stinky. Not sure why, it was so cold tonight I doubt i was that sweaty. I think its the port st lucie dirt. The fields are very well kept, maybe its fresh manure daily?

Some things I am afraid of:
That I'm not a "good enough" ultimate player.
That I won't have the relationship I have always dreamed of.
Brice will hate me
Everyone hates me
Getting old and unable to function
getting fat.


I feel chubby right now. I look good and I am fit and running well, but these stupid extra pounds are laughing at me! ha hahaha! I could lose 15 lbs and be dramatically healthier. But no, i have to have my double cheeseburger, my cookies, my breads. I'm such a putz.

Losing weight is a microcosm of my life maybe. I could have a much better quality of living with just a simple commitment, that i can't even make let alone keep! or maybe, I just like to eat ;)

Who, I just realized my hat tourney is falling to the side, time to get back on track, tomorrow i need to email tim to get the rick guys email for the fields in pb gardens.

Somethings I will take on soon, clearing space in my head and heart to see Doug as his Creator would see him. Putz, no no no... Also building Kelly a little website for Just Imagine.

I'm going home this month, really big opportunity!